Be prepared for the emotional roller coaster!

Going through a divorce may be one of the most stressful times of your life. Let s face it; just thinking about getting a divorce is the pits. There s the disappointment of knowing that your marriage just isn t working. Maybe you feel anger at your spouse for not living up to your expectations. There may be issues of abuse, infidelity, or substance addiction that have left your emotions raw.

If you are the one who decided to end the marriage, you may experience a lot of sadness. You probably took the vows of forever very seriously, and it s hard to

admit that you can t live up to them. Sometimes you just can't make it work and it s better to move on. It s common to feel guilty that you are putting your family through a lot of turmoil. It helps to remember that they would still experience turmoil if you were to stay in a bad marriage. If your husband has served you with divorce papers out of the blue, it can be an incredible blow to your emotions. There s disbelief, hurt, anger, and the never-ending question of why. Even if the decision to divorce is mutual, there is a sadness that descends as you let go of the dream of a happy marriage.

The emotions you feel are very real and can swing from giddiness over the possibility of being free to the utter despair of feeling lost and alone. One of the best things that you can do for yourself is to get the emotional support that you need. Divorce is in essence the death of your marriage. Unfortunately, there is not the same community support for divorcing couples, as there would be for a death in the family. You will need to reach out to your circle of friends and family to get the emotional support that you need.

Talk to a trusted friend or family member about what is going on. Join a support group or talk to a counselor about what you are experiencing. Writing in a journal can also help you to release all the pent-up emotions that you are feeling. Eventually you will progress from merely surviving to healing, and from there you will begin your growth as an individual. Time allows you to heal.